Sundays..

Yesterday started early.. We had training in UG with Jin. Chairwoman, me and Jin went for lunch, Jin's requirement was, it must have a little boy's room. We walked down the road... reached the traffic light junction and Jin couldn't hold it any longer. We walked back the way we came, and went into Planet Hollywood for lunch.

Thanks for lunch, Jin. God knows Chairwoman and I did enough damage on Saturday.

Class was good, we ended class slightly earlier than expected. I thought I had plans and then I didn't. And I spent almost an hour at the Business Centre, doing what I do best.

The evening was good, I went home for a nap. And woke up to watch LOTR : ROTK. Not my favourite, not something I would particularly wake up to watch. If I had the remote, I'd watch the repeat of CSI.

This morning started early. The day is not the same without Chairwoman. Actually, days are not the same because there is no Breakfast Manager when Chairwoman is not around. I had to walk out to get my own breakfast. The good thing is, I have my Shuffle to accompany me. I love my Shuffle.

Today is Monday. Moanday. What's the difference? I'm in need of some mood stabilizers.

I hope you have a good and productive day ahead. I wish myself the same, and will work towards attaining it.

Shoes & Me

Shoes has always been a Carrie Bradshaw thing, $400 for a pair of Manalo Blahniks?! Never a me thing, I only buy shoes when I need them. I've never bought more than 1 pair of shoes on the same day (except that time in Beijing, I bought 3 pairs of shoes in less than an hour, that was different coz we didn't have that much time to shop and I was desperate!)

When you go shopping with the right person, the handbags and shoes person (ie Chairwoman) you are bound to walk into many beautiful shoes and handbags.

I bought two pairs of shoes, and it cost me less than MYR 60. I love my new pairs of shoes! Thanks to Chairwoman who was very helpful in selection. I'm so glad we did yesterday...

We started the day with lunch at Teppanyaki and the rest of the day smelling like lunch. Then just for fun, we now each have a little dolphin key chain.

Shoes, handbags and dresses, are serious stuff, not fun stuff like dolphin key chains! Don't joke about those stuff. Suddenly, I feel so Carrie. I only hope that I don't end up 30ish, penniless, with a closet full of shoes! And/Or have men in my life like Mr. Big (who is oh-so-gorgeous but such a MCP)

The afternoon went on well, we overspent and thank god there's Plastic Power. We were in need of help and then... divine intervention... Chairwoman's FC appeared with purchasing power. THANK YOU!! And need I say more, we continued shopping.

The evening for the PussyCat and SmellyCat ended at about 6. Mine continued... with more expensive purchases of Limited Editions CD perfumes.

Days like yesterday should be repeated, but not at this time of the month. It's scary and it's addictive.

The night ended early, except heavy rain woke me up at 3. And more rain when I woke up to come to work at 6ish.

Today is going to be a great day ahead! (Except I won't be able to watch Charmed at 12 noon)
I'll live. :)

Be careful...

Of your intake of music first thing in the morning. I had a dangerous start in the morning, on my iPod... There's a reason why it's called the Shuffle... It plays whatever it wants to!

I started the day with an angry song, Alanis Morissette's You Oughta Know.
It put a frown on my face, that's what always happen when I hear that song. And to start the day with that song!!!

And, be careful of what you overhear in the locker room. We, females, tend to talk a lot about this and that. You don't want to know what you don't want to know. Ignorance is bliss! (To some of you who have known me since #Marquis, you'd know that I am referred to as Ikan Bilis!) Ignorance is BLISS!

Practice this :
- No idea
- Don't know
- Don't care
- Don't want to know

Best rules for locker-time talk: MYOB.

Freedom of speech allows people to talk about anything and everything they want. Me, for example, my life is an open book. Is there anything about me that you don't know?

If you cannot ignore it, feign ignorance! Or do that mental thing Chairwoman caught from me. "Does this look like a face that cares?!"

Walk away. And, Don't Look Back In Anger.

The team..

Cancelled on me! How dare they!! They cancelled on our Saturday plans... That would mean I won't be able to watch Constantine. Chairwoman has seen it, and she won't go and watch it with me. But agreed to go shoe-shopping with me. Upset!

This is also the only chance I have to bring my team out... Together! It's the end of the month, they said... and they are a little short! :X

Chairwoman, you know me, and you know my situation (thanks for coffee this morning, I wouldn't have made it without...)

Training the team has been fruitful. Fun and I learn a lot of about them. :)

Today, I came to work with my Disciplinary Teacher look. I feel so groggy. I need some TLC... My mentor said, "Give yourself some time..." Time is a luxury I don't have... As much as I want to, it's not up to me. It's not about me.

I hate being tired because I feel stupid. I hate feeling stupid. I don't like bringing all these tiredness back home.

I didn't get to watch Charmed coz we had plans that night, I wouldn't get to see the repeat on Sunday noon coz I'd be working.

For all the "play that keeps us sane" thing, I need some magic quick-fix. My sense of humour is depleating.

Did I say...

I have work that provides sustenance...? I do not! AND I HATE IT.

I'm just saying it, saying it. I don't mean it. I will be alright this time tomorrow. Heh.

I was here all day all night, yesterday. I couldn't believe it. That is how I "excel" under pressure? I went for yam char after 10 ish, and end up talking about work, how unhealthy! Got home, hardly slept much, coz I kept thinking about my baby and my new editions. Got up at 6 to come to work.

The team is a small one, but good one. Needs a little moulding, that's all. We all need a little moulding. Try shaping mashed potatoes, that proves to be quite a challenge. Quite a challenge. But you know me, a talk with my mentor and you will have me back on my feet. Dancing to Frank, who Makes Me Feel So Young.

It is honestly true, don't talk about work after work. It is an ugly 4 letter word. Don't!
I felt worse after the yam char session, not because I know I gotta get up before 6, but because I kept talking about it and it became me.

I came to work early to join my L&G for line-up for morning shift. It has to start with me. And getting the momentum going is difficult, something I want to be able to do. As a Firewalker® graduate, you can expect me to Step Up. All eyes on me, I am stepping up.

The Usual Suspects rounded me up for a Sat night out. I rejected flatly. Straight out.

Good to great news!

When I said I cannot look forward to go to SC & B's place.. we were the earliest to arrive, besides Layne & Eric, who has been there all evening...

And to think that we were the only people working on weekends, we made good time!

As I was opening the gate, SC came running to me, clumsily.. and she had this look on her face... such happiness. (I thought she was happy to see me) Then she said, "I'm pregnant!!!!"
I completely forgot how to open the gate. I just stood there, in awe, my jaw dropped.

I said to Steve, "Quickly open the gate, I need to go hug that happy pregnant woman!!"

Hug her I did.. and hugged her again. I am so happy to hear of the good news. This time next year, I'd have a little little baby in my arms.. SC & B's little baby... awww....

(Did I ever mention I love children and I love pregnant women?)

We sat around... all eyes on us, as usual, asking stuff like... "When's your turn?" And even worse, receiving ang pao's and having elders say, "This year is the last one I'm giving out to you!!"

So I decided to postpone the wedding, so Summer's getting married in August. All of a sudden I am not the me I am this time last year. My friends realised that with a little awe and ...(resentment?). I think this hairstyle made some unspoken statement.

I'm marrying the hotel this year and I am going to nurture this baby till it crawls, before I think of myself.

Everything seems so juvenile, everything seem so irrelevant, everything seem so... sad that all I think about is my baby.

By 10ish, they knew they lost me. If you known me to be the talkative one, you know something's wrong with me when I don't talk. I excused myself and went home... I slept by 11pm.

Sunday, I had my wake up call, on time. It was Chairwoman.
What better to wake up to if not for gossip!
Chairwoman, Have I told you lately that I love you?

This is the woman who replied me sensible when I said, "I want to get my hair dyed."
Chairwoman, "You need to be setting examples, my dear...!"

How many people do you know who would help and guide your success and not hate you or envy you for it? How many people (from work) do you drag your ass out to meet on your day off? How many people know it's time for you to wake up, and loves gossip for breakfast?

At 12 noon, I saw the repeat of CSI. As much as I am not a Grissom person, I like the team.

Gonna meet Chairwoman and head towards Jin's place. (Love the guns!)

Had dinner with the team and went home to some paperwork that I have been putting off... Things at home seem a little... Let me find the right song to tell you the story.

Alanis Morissette says it good, but she says it with her the one wearing the pants...
"as we were taking outside it was cold we were shivering yet warmed by the subject matter my wife is in the next room we've been having troubles you know please don't tell her or anyone but I need to talk to somebody"

So, I'm good. I'm focused on my baby. Nothing can change that. And I still want to be the turbo-charged Forrester mom.
Nothing's changed. I'm still me. Just a more determined me.

Be happy for me. Thanks...

Unchartered Territory

I have been on such "mood" this morning till now. It is now mid-afternoon and I am listening to The Cure.

My only highlight was house tour with Mr. Em. Which he thanked me politely and not modestly. Knowing him!

I had a few run-ins today, which caused lunch to be delayed until 2.00pm. I went for lunch with my all-time favourite person, me, myself and I. (Narcissist Shine 0 what else is new!)

Tonight, we have a get-together CNY dinner to attend. I don't know if I am looking forward to it. My body feels so drained and my eyes, heavier by the minute. Since I had late lunch, I feel even worse to get back to work.. I am so completely exhausted!

As much as I want to see them and finish work early, I will not be able to. Yesterday night I made a decision to go, and I am living with the consequences and will not impose my selfish wants unto my friends. I will attend the dinner as expected. As much as I hate to put up with petty chats, today I will have to wipe that frown off my face and put in 200% effort. It is CNY and my friends have bothered to make this arrangement.

I've known a few of them for more than 17 years. I can always say that fun is guaranteed with this usual crowd. We normally meet up once a month to do the "catch up" thing and NEVER, NEVER mention the ugly 4 letter word... W* *K!

I am hoping to get some quality photos this evening. And getting me psyched up for this dinner. It is so exciting! SC and B's first CNY together as married couple! Maybe next year we see SC & B Jr at CNY get-togethers?!! Hee..

I wore my glasses to work this morning... I haven't done that since April 2004. My girls said I looked like a Disciplinary Teacher. I was appalled. Well, true enough, I look dreadful this morning and my eyes could hardly open. It's a miracle I woke up today.

I will never put myself through such physical torture again. Remind me, slap me, if you must, but remind me!

You know what...

The worse thing about going out with your friends is.. when they get drunk.
It's not you, it's them. You know me well enough to know that I am not the kind who drinks and drinks and forget myself. I am too responsible for that. I am too disciplined for that. Hey, I am my daddy's daughter and I do not disgrace him.

There was a party of 11 people and I totally regret joining them. The next time I want to consider going out with this set of people, remind me to not think twice. Just reject the offer and stay in with a good movie. (or some good TLC)

When you work with them, they embody the L&G serving L&G, when out of uniform.. I don't know what to say. Only that I am disappointed to have such "friends". Whoever did mention it's Lonely At The Top? (and I don't mean my gf FiBi)

I hardly had 4 hours sleep, my own doing. I have no complaints. Just the company. My mistake, error of judgement. I just cannot believe that these G can be so... bold. (?)

You can always be careful about you, but when the others you are with are intoxicated.... doesn't matter how sober you are, you end up just like them (soberly aware and hating the fact that you are there and is aware)

I don't know why but I just don't want to see this set of people again. Thank God I am in a different building. I mean... why should I be embarassed that they were the ones behaving badly and it was them crossing the lines and it was them so totally out of place. Why should I feel their shame?

J, who was sober and driving us home.. I pity the commotion going on in his only 1-month-old car. When I got down the car, I thanked him and apologised that I have friends as the ones in his back seat...

Why oh why do I find the need to apologise for the errors of other people? Because I know how they were behaving last night...?

If Chairwoman was working today, I'd have asked for a room to be blocked so I could catch up on some sleep. But you know me, I am too responsible and too discipline!!

"Love doesn't make the world go round, it's what make the ride worthwhile"

Guess who's back!

Steve is finally back from his home town, after 6 days. Didn't feel like he was gone for very long. Must be the job, the long, tiring, exhausing and challenging job I have taken up this year. I enjoy it, I love the fact that I am once again on the track to "work that provides sustenance".

Last year this time, when Steve left for 6 days, I called KC almost everyday, crying, missing Steve. This year, I didn't call anyone crying. My friends didn't know Steve was gone coz they didn't get any distress call from me. (cute!)

I have been the absolute good girl when Steve was away. (So unbelievable!) To those of you (dated some time back!) you know I can be absolutely good, so good (at what?!) at being good.

I bought a new toy, spur of the moment. Seemed like something rational to do then. I was the only person in the two properties in my vicinity who uses floppy disk! (OMG) I bought the new iPod Shuffle and had Qert loading music into it. (Thank you!)

When it comes to music, I get so sensitive... I said, Frank and Alanis Morissette. I got both Frank and Alanis Morissette. Great!

Qert asked, what else...

and I said... how about U2, Aerosmith, nice cool soundtracks, Depeche Mode or the Fab 4?

Qert replied : Ok, I'll take care of it.

Boy he sure took care of it. I have Sade, Everything But The Girl, Jamie Cullum (JAMIE CULLUM, can you believe it?!)

Be careful of your music intake, especially if someone else have access. It's your choice, it's your life! Since I am so new with the new toy, I haven't learned how to "rip" and.. I don't remember what was the word Qert used.. Tomorrow I have another lesson with Qert.

I am a Frank person over and over again (Just as I am a Horatio person over and over again)

I love the toy, and mom had no idea I bought a new toy at that costly amount! I don't plan to tell mom.. it's small enough to hide from her ;-)

Steve is already in town and is waiting to pick me up from work. Here I am, still stuck with my s**t.. I had to turn down Boss' offer going to Starbucks! (Have you ever known me to turn down Starbucks?!!!) I am amazed myself. But I did it.

So.. again, the priority hierachy :
- Family that justifies our sole existance
- Work that provides sustenance
- Play that keeps us sane
- Religion that provides inner strenght

Or you can read Norman Vincent Peale's The Power of Positive Thinking and THEN Anthony Robbins ®'s Unleash The Power Within

I love all of you who are reading this, and those who are not as well...

V Day

It had to be V-Day. It just had to!! Why does everything get so pre-defined with this day?

I spend a year plus at my second job in RCKL and developed such a hatred towards flowers. Steve bought me flowers and had them sent to my office, 2 days before V Day, thinking that I wouldn't hate it as much as it wasn't on the correct day.

Steve hasn't been around since Friday night last week, CNY holidays... went back to see his folks.

I had unconfirmed plans with a friend who had unconfirmed plans and me as back up plan.... We're squared out... by the heavy rain. Called it even and still got stranded from the heavy rain for an hour. I was hanging around the smoking area and knew I should have just changed back into my uniform and gone back to work. At least it would have been a productive hour. But no, I sat with the rest of the people with the same fortune as me, at the smoking area stranded coz of the heavy rain.

Brilliant idea struck me. My knight in shining armour! Just a phone call away.

Thankfully he had no plans, surprising coz he's always got someone or another. He came to pick me up and we went to have dinner. Of all lovely places, we went to my favourite breakfast place. I can proudly say, we had breakfast for dinner. Pan in State, great place that serves 24 hours breakfast. Love it!

This man I am spending V Day with, I've known him for 4 years and would trust my life in his hands, every aspect of my life into his hands.... This man, who bought me assam laksa from Penang and sent to my house, just coz I had a craving. What other man to spend V Day with, if not him?

We always have these kinda chat/coffee sessions together. Most of the time, we just understand each other, some inexplicable connection.

Thank you for spending V Day with me and for coming over on Sunday. You know I don't have that many friends, but glad I could always count on you.

Francis.. ol' blue eyes...

Have been listening to a lot of songs lately... however only two or three albums has been played repeatedly. Songs that I could listen to when I work.

I have an amazing boss, when Qert said something to the effect like, "I hope she's got some brains.." My boss replied, "Hey, the only person here with very little brains is me. Everyone in this room has moe brains that I do. So no talks about who's got little brain or no brain."

Two songs, dedicated to one daddy I know who loves unconditionally...

John Mayer -

I know a girl

She puts the color inside of my world

She's just like a maze

Where all of the walls all continually change
I've done all i can

To stand on the steps with my heart in my hands

Now i started to thinkMaybe its got nothing to do with me.
So fathers be good to your daughters,

Daughters will love like you do,

Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So mothers be good to your daughters too.
Oh
Oh you see that skin

It's the same she's been standing in

Since the day you two met

I bet i was on your mind

Never ever any time
Oh yeah

So fathers be good to your daughters,

Daughters will love like you do, yeah

Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So mothers be good to your daughters too.
Boys you can break

Find out how much they can take

Boys will be strong and Boys soldier on

But boys would be gone

Without warmth of a woman's good good heart
On behalf of every man

Looking out for every girl

You are the god and the weight of her world

On behalf of ever man

Who's looking out for every girl

You are the god and you are the weight of her world
So fathers be good to your daughters,

Daughters will love like you do,

Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So mothers be good to your daughters too

So mothers be good to your daughters too

So mothers be good to your daughters too

Alanis Morissette -

Please be philosophical

Please be tapped into your femininity

Please be able to take the wheel from me

Please be crazy and curious

Papa love your princess so that she will find loving princes familiar

Papa cry for your princess so that she will find gentle princes familiar

Please be a sexaholic

Please be unpredictably miserable

Please be self absorbed much (not the good kind)

Please be addicted to some substance

Papa listen to your princess so that she will find attentive princes familiar

Papa hear your princess so that she will find curious princes familiar

Please be the jerk of my knee i've fit you always

You finish my sentences I think I love you

What is your name again no matter i'm guessing your thoughts again correctly and I love the way You press my buttons so much sometimes I could strangle you

Papa laugh with your princess so that she will find funny princes familiar

Papa respect your princess so that she will find respectful princes familiar

Papa love your princess so that she will find loving princes familiar
Papa cry for your princess so that she will find gentle princes familiar

Please be strangely enigmatic

Please be just like my ....

Frank Sinatra - (The only reason why this is here is because I like Frank)

She walks like an angel walks,
she talks like an angel talks,
And her hair has a kind of curl,
to my mind, she's my kind of girl.

She's wise like an angel's wise,
with eyes like an angel's eyes,
And a smile like a kind of pearl,
to my mind, she's my kind of girl.

A pretty little face,
that face just knocks me off my feet,
A pretty little feet, she's really sweet enough to eat.

She looks like an angel looks,
she cooks like an angel cooks,
And my mind in a kind of whirl,
to my mind, she's my kind of girl.

Hmmm, pretty little face,
that face just knocks me off my feet,
Pretty little feet, she's really sweet enough to eat.

She looks like an angel looks,
and she cooks like an angel cooks,
And my mind in a kind of whirl,
to my mind, she's my kind of girl.
Yes, my poor heart's in a whirl,
she's just my kind, she's a girl.
And I'm glad.