No time...

Yesterday was a long and eventful day. I was in the office by 7am and already started my paperwork. Boss came in at 7.20am and said to me, "What is wrong with you?! You're staying late tonight, right? Why do you come in so early!"

I didn't know how to reply him.

I had lunch/coffee with a long-time missing mentor. I could hardly remember how Planet Starbucks coffee tastes like. It's been so long since my last coffee session at Planet Starbucks. Along with coffee and mentor, I had a large slice of blackforest cake. (I'm not a cake person. It's the first time I had blackforest since the night I turned 20)

At 8pm, we finally sat back down unto our seats in the office and met each other face to face. It's really weird how we don't really see each other most of the day.

My days has been totally eventful. It's been 3 days since my last posting. The days are strange and I finally understood what it meant "Is it possible to wake up as someone else?"

My days has been such zoned-out pockets of spaces in my mind. It has been such a challenge to search my brain for something intelligent to say when asked by Big Potato. I got shot on the afternoon before I had my blackforest cake. It was as if the blackforest cake was indulgence to salvage my bruised being.

I had The Last Dinner with Boss at Jake's and we spoke of work and of children. We went back to the office smelling like dinner. It was weird to see Boss clear off his table like that. He handed everything over to me and didn't exchange sobs or gluckst. Just clear-cut straight-to-the-point goodbyes. Like the kind of person he is. I said to him, "Get out of my lobby right now!"

He replied, "With pleasure". He left with a limp and an intact frown.

My heart jumped to my throat for 3 seconds and that's all I let it get to. This amazing man who has pushed me beyond my limits and drives me eternally crazy and pressured. This man is going away for two months. Every mention of his departure being "permanent", I shushed him. I couldn't live with it if it happens. I know my career is like a game to the Big Potato, I will never have a say in anything. Yet this is the choices I have made and will have to live with it. I am being paid to be inconvenienced. I don't have to like what I'm doing.

Even with Boss finally leaving the office at 10.20pm, I ran around to the "other" lobby in search of the night MOD and joined in the night line-up. I only left at 11.10pm and I switched off like a light. Just as I dozed off, the sister hotel called me requested assistance. Now I know why I attended night line-up. So I could still be here in the morning.

Whatever happens, I'm still here. No matter how much I moan about this job, I know I will moan more when they take this away from me. My Boss laughed his sarcastic hysterical laugh when I said that. I told him I'm a sucker for self-inflicted pain.

I will still be here tomorrow at 11pm. Steve is on leave for the next 3 days and he will spend it lazing at home and watching all my Sex & The City DVDs and Samurai X Season 1. He will see very little of me and I will see very little of him.

If the "help" they said they were going to send is on the way, I look forward to getting a few days off. I would like to go home and see Steve's dad. And maybe a quick one night stay at my favourite sort-of out-of-town escape, Putrajaya Shangri-La. *Sigh*

A friend dropped by my lobby this evening and shocked the frozen-interior off me. He shoke my hands, I know he wanted to give me a big hug. But it was my lobby and he knows he has to behave. I feel so treasured. In the short few days that he's back, he took half an hour out to see me. :D

Momentarily shocked myself as I remembered Chairwoman will finally be back on duty tomorrow morning and breakfast fellowship will resume as normal. I will be here tonight, tomorow morning, tomorrow night, the day after tomorrow and yadda-yadda-yadda...

Can I take an extended leave of medical emergency? I need to be re-boot.