Wrenching Guts

As it takes a lot of guts to be able to accept it.. I did the only thing possible.

I am too old for this shit. But I seem to be the only person reacting to being old.

Over the weekend, Jules, Ting and me was over at Jerri Berry's place. A much needed getaway for all 3 of us girls. Don't ask.

It was just the girls spending time together. Doing girly things.

Sigh.



I got home on Sunday afternoon and slept it away. Got up at 9 to begin my CSI Supreme Sundays. I was quite reluctant to go away, but manage to have my Sunday floor time all planned out.

By the time it was Race Day, I was throwing my guts out and made very good friends with my toilet. Yes, upsetting news that Kimi did not start anywhere close to pole position.

But the time the race started, I was at throwing up round 2.

I had such a headache that I fell asleep there on the floor. By the time I was found, I was feverish and having cold sweats.

I'm getting old.

I was woken up and asked to get into the room, under proper blanket and drink some water.


I had difficulties sleeping coz I know the race is on. And I want to watch Kimi win a race (yeah, right) and the sounds of these powerful engines was playing at the back of my head.
In my fevered condition, I could not get out of bed.. and my tummy was aching so bad. I wasn't sure if I was crying of sweating as I fell asleep.

On Monday morning I woke up and decided to get myself some milk, bad choice. Coz I once again made friends with my guts in the toilet.

And the pain did not stop. Not a wink beginning 7.30 am.

I woke up with no wonderful notions of any help any changes any difference. Because I know what I had was a wonderful dream. It was a wonderful "what if" and it was not possible.


If it was not an option back in November, it is not an option now in June.

And no. This is not a message for any particular person.